Cat in a Dog Suit

Some dogs are cats in disguise

There are definite differences between big dogs and little dogs. I have big dogs. They act like dogs. My sister has a small dog, Roxie, whom we met for the first time on a recent visit. She doesn’t act anything like my pooches. In fact, her personality is distinctly feline. If you ask me, she’s a cat in a dog suit.

I don’t draw this conclusion lightly. My hypothesis that Roxie is a cat in disguise is based on scientific observation. I compared her to my big dogs in several categories of animal behavior. My findings are below.

Data reveals feline personality traits

Cats conserve their strength by controlling the amount of energy they exert. My dogs walk on their own four feet. Roxie is transported in the arms of her owners at least 80% of the time. When riding in the car, my dogs stick their noses out the window and let their ears flap in the breeze. Roxie rides regally in her booster seat affixed to the front passenger seat, and enjoys looking through the windshield. (I observed this from my vantage point in the back seat.)

Cats are notoriously fickle eaters. Roxie’s palate also demands variety. My dogs eat dry kibble. Roxie prefers hers with a dollop of scrambled eggs on top, garnished with crumbs of buttered English muffin. She is also fond of rice, chicken adobo, and anything else she can wheedle out of my brother-in-law when he’s eating. We resorted to shutting Roxie in the bathroom at mealtime. We didn’t want the poor man to waste away just because he’s a pushover for a beggar with a cute, furry face.

My dogs sleep on dog beds on the floor. Roxie naps most of the day curled up on the couch. When she goes to work with my sister, she has a chair in the office dedicated to her somnolent comfort. At night, she sleeps in their bed, and is purported to be quite a hog with the covers. She also prefers that they refrain from stretching and moving their legs about. Catlike, she will growl and pounce on the offending limbs whenever her sleep is interrupted.

Cats have staff

There is a unilateral maxim that “dogs have owners, and cats have staff.” As a dog owner, I play fetch with my dogs. Chasing the ball allows them exercise and stimulates their retrieval skills. Playing with my dogs builds our owner-pet bond. In Roxie’s version of fetch, she noses her ball under the coffee table and then barks at me to retrieve it. Playing with her exercises me and builds my retrieval skills.

Curiously, the one toy that gets Roxie revved up and moving is a laser pointer. She’ll chase that little red dot all over the house, leaping and pouncing at it to trap it under her paw. Just like a cat. A cat in a dog suit. Gotta be.

The evidence speaks for itself.